MORE Small people words and actions

BANANAS ARE THE BEST

Banana, banana, bananas are the best
A nice squishy middle in a big yella vest
Today or manãna, ah'll be sayin, "Canna
Canna have a banana?"

What am ah gonny have fur ma tea? – BANANA
Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Fridee – BANANA
What’s ma Sunday dinner gonna be?- BANANA
Canna have a banana?

Fifty million monkeys can't be wrong - BANANA
From totie wans tae Old King Kong - BANANA
They all love tae sing this song - BANANA
Canna have a banana?

You can slid down a tree on the skin
Wear it on your head fur a hat
Try and use a coackienut for that
Canna have a banana?

You can stick it in yer ear fur a phone
Throw it to yer dog fur a bone
Buy me a jungle o my own
Canna have a banana?

It's long and it's yella and it's bent
The taste is heaven sent
Don't waste your money on yer rent
Canna have a banana?
Words by Ewan McVicar, tune African

BONNY WEE BARRA

Ma auntie Jean frae Greenock came
Alang wi ma auntie Lizzie
They said the trains is bad this yrear
They used tae be less busy

They gave me a penny tae buy some rock
But ah met wi wee O'Hara
He said 'Gie me a sook o yer rock
An ah'll gie ye a hgurl in ma barra'

Oh, the bonny wee barra's mine
]It disny belang tae O'Hara
For the fly wee bloke, he stuck tae ma rock
Noo ah'm gonny stick tae his barra

COULTER'S CANDY

Ally bally, ally bally bee,
Sittin on yer mammy’s knee
Greetin for a wee bawbee
Tae buy some Coulter’s Candy.

Willie wept baith lang and sair,
Till he got a penny tae share
Noo he’s tumblin doon the stair
Tae buy some Coulter’s Candy.

Poor wee Annie was greetin tae,
What could poor auld Mammy dae?
But gie them a penny atween them twae
Tae buy mair Coulter’s Candy.

Oor wee Jeannie wis lookin affa thin,
A rickle o banes covered ower wi skin
Noo she’s gettin a wee double chin
Sookin Coulter’s Candy.

Here comes Coulter doon the street,
The man the bairns aa like tae meet
His big black bag it hauds a treat
It’s full o Coulter’s Candy.

EVERYWHERE WE GO

Everywhere we go
People always ask us
Who we are
And where we come frae
And we tell them
We come frae Scotland
Bonny bonny Scotland
And if they canny hear us
We shout a little louder

FINGERS MOUTH AND TOES

I've got fingers on my hands, so have you,
I've got fingers on my hands, so have you,
I've got fingers on my hands,
Though some are thumbs I understand,
I've got fingers, so have you.

I've got eyes with which to see, so have you.
I see you and you see me.

I've got a nose with which to sniff,
If anything's going I catch a whiff.

I've got ten wiggly toes,
They finish my feet off, I suppose.

I've got a mouth that's full of teeth,
Up above and down beneath.

I've got two listening ears,
With holes in the middle so I can hear.
Words by Ewan McVicar

I THINK I KNOW A MAN
I think I know a man, I think his name is Fred
I think he goes to bed at night with jelly on his head
Jelly on his head, jelly on his head
How can he sleep at night with jelly on his head?

I think I know a girl, I think her name is Grace
I think she goes to bed at night with fried egg on her face.

I think I know a lady, her name is Mrs Speirs
I think she goes to bed at night with icecream in her ears.

I think I know a boy, I think his name is Mike
I think he goes to bed at night and tries to ride a bike.

I think I know a girl, her name is Alison
I think she goes to bed at night and chews upon a bun

I think I know a boy, I think his name is John
I think he goes to bed at night with no pyjamas on!
By Ewan McVicar, but first verse partly by a four year old.
Also known as No Pyjamas On or Jelly On His Head.

I'VE A LADDIE IN AMERICA

I've a laddie in America
I've another in Dundee ay ee ay ee
I've another in Australia
And that's the one who's goin tae marry me ay ee ay ee.

First he took me tae the dancin
Then he took me tae my tea
Then he ran away and left me
Wi three bonny bairnies on my knee.

One was sittin by the fireside
Another was sittin on my knee
Another was sittin by the doorway
Singin "Daddie, daddie, please come back tae me".
When you sing 'ay' hold up your index fingers to make the letter 'I'.
When you sing 'ee' hold up your thumbs, index and middle fingers to make the letter 'E'.

MURDER IN THE CHIP SHOP

Last night there was a murder in the chip shop
A wee dog stole a haddy bone [show wee dog's size]
A big dog tried tae tak it aff him [show big dopg's size]
So ah hit it wi a tattie scone. [mime slapping dog]

Ah went round tae see ma Auntie Sarah [point with thumb]
But ma Auntie Sarah wisnae in [spread hands out]

So ah peeked through a hole in the windae [looking through hole made by thumb and index finger]
And ah shouted "Auntie Sarah, are ye in?" [shout]

Her false teeth were lyin on the table [point to teeth, then table]
Her curly wig wis lying on the bed [point to head, then lower for bed]
And ah nearly split ma sides wi laughin [shake belly]
When ah saw her screwing off her wudden leg. [screwing off leg]

ONE O'CLOCK GUN

One o'clock, the gun's gone off [stamp at One]
I can stay no longer [tap 'wrist watch]
If I do my ma will say
I've been playing with the boys over yonder. [point over shoulder]

My stockings white, my garters blue [point to them]
My shoes all lined with silver [point to them]
A red red rose upon my breast [point to breast]
And a gold ring on my finger. [point to finger]

1 2 3, MA GRANNIE WENT TAE SEA

1 2 3 ma grannie went tae sea
With a parrot on her shoulder and a banjo on her knee.

1 2 3 and 4 5 6 ma grannie did the splits
The parrot yelled 'Murder' and the banjo fell tae bits.

4 5 6 and 7 8 9 they found a gold mine
But the parrot told the neighbours, just for auld lang syne.

7 8 9 and 10 11 12 they came and helped themselves
Ma grannie caught the parrot and she rang its little bell.

10 11 12 and 12 11 10 she rang its bell again
And the parrot said, "Who's there? Who are ye callin hen?"

12 11 10 and 10 9 8 she told the parrot straight
"You're a polly-wolly doodle-bug, ye wee featherweight".

10 9 8 and 8 7 6 we were all in a fix
The parrot chewed a carrot and ma grannie showed us tricks

8 7 6 and 6 5 4 ma grannie found a door
So we all went home and there isn't any more

Oh no there is so
3 2 1 GO!

A B C ma grannie found a flea
She salted it and peppered it and had it for her tea.

A B C and D E F ma grannie went deaf
Goin to the football and shoutin at the ref.

D E F and G H I ma grannie made a pie
Bluebottle biscuits and bread-and butterfly.

G H I and J K L ma grannie made a smell
What did she smell like? Not very well.

J K L and M N O ma grannie broke her toe
They put her in the hospital, they wouldny let her go.

M N O and P Q R ma grannie bought a car
She took us out for hurlies on the handlebar.

P Q R and S T U ma grannie caught the flu
Doin the Hokey Cokey wi a kangaroo.

S T U and V W ma grannie turned blue
We put her in the bed and we cried Boo Hoo.

But X Y Z ma grannie wasny dead
So instead of getting buried she got married instead.

I know ma A B C and you know as much as ma grannie.
By Ewan McVicar

OUR LITTLE PIGS

Our little pigs lie with their backs all bare
Bare [grunt] -are, sing da deedle ah
Me dad was a bonny wee man
[Man - high pitched] [grunt] -an
Oh, me dad was a bonny wee man.

Our little pigs lie with their tails half cocked
Cocked[grunt] -ocked
Our old sow gives the finest of pork, pork [grunt] -ork
Our old sow gives the finest of bacon, bacon [grunt] -acon

'Grunt' is a low pig noise, 'man' is the sound of a little squealing pig

QUEEN MARY QUEEN MARY

Queen Mary, Queen Mary, my age is sixteen
My faither's a fairmer on yonder green
He's plenty of money tae dress me sae braw
But there's nae bonny laddie tae tak me awa.

Each morning I rise and I look in the glass
Says I tae masel "Ye're a handsome young lass"
Put ma hands on ma hips and I give a ha-ha
But there's nae bonny laddie tae tak me awa.

The World Must Be Coming to an End

We sent her for eggs, oh aye, oh aye.
We sent her for eggs, oh aye, oh aye.
We sent her for eggs, and she fell and broke her legs.
Oh, the world must be comin tae an end, oh aye.

We sent her for cheese, and she fell and skint her knees.

We sent her for butter, and she dropped it in the gutter.

We sent her for spaghetti, she got eaten by a yeti.

We sent her for breid and she drapped doon deid

We sent her for jam and she brought back ham

WHEN I WAS ONE

When I was one I sucked my thumb [suck thumb]
The day I went to sea [hand shades eyes]
I went aboard the pirate ship [hands mounting steps]
And the captain said to me [point to other, then self]
"We're going this way, that way [sway to left then right]
Forward and back way [sway forward and back]
Over the Irish Sea [lean far over forward]
A bottle of rum to fill my tum [thumb rasied for bottle, pat tummy]
And that's the life for me". [thumb up for satisfaction]

When I was two I tied my shoe [bend to tie shoe]
When I was three I skelped my knee [slap knee]
When I was four I shut the door [stamp and mime shutting door]
When I was five I did a dive [diving]
When I was six I did the splits [doing splits]
When I was seven I went to heaven [hands clasped, eyes skyward]
When I was eight I shut the gate [stamp and mime shutting gate]
When I was nine I broke my spine [wobble back like a jelly]
When I was ten I started again [roll both hands]

WHEN YOU SEE A PUDDLE

When you see a puddle you have to go splash [stamp]
Splash splash splash, splash splash splash
When you see a puddle you have to go splash
That's what a puddle is for

When you see a lion you have to go rrrahhhrr [hands as claws]
When you see a giraffe you have to go munch [reach one hand high]
When you see a crocodile you have to go snap [two hands for jaws]
When you see a monkey you have to go oo gah [one hand under armpit, other hand reaching up]
When ou see a kangaroo you have to go bounce [bounce in seat]
When you see a mouse you have to go eek [mime cleaning whiskers]
When you see a puppy dog you have to go aaawww [mime stroking]
When you see a baby you have to go tickle [mime tickling]
When you see a motor bike you have to go vroom vroom [mime revving handlebars]
By Ewan McVicar

WHO'LL COME IN TAE MA WEE RING

Who'll come in tae ma wee ring, ma wee ring, ma wee ring [one hand making a horizontal circle]
Who'll come in tae ma wee ring tae mak it a wee bit bigger? [two hands showing circle widening]

Choose choose who ye'll tak, who ye'll tak, who ye'll tak [pointing round the group]
Choose choose who ye'll tak, a lassie or a wee laddie [pointing to girl then boy]

Bee baw babbity, babbity, babbity [pat thighs in time]
Bee baw babbity, a lassie or a wee laddie [pointing to girl then boy]

Small people Words & Actions

BUY ME A BANANA

Ma, Ma, will you buy me a, buy me a, buy me a
Ma, Ma, will you buy me a, buy me a banana? [hold up one thumb as banana]

Yes my son, I’ll buy you a, buy you a, buy you a
Yes my son, I’ll buy you a, buy you a banana

Ma, Ma, will you peel the skin?
The skin of my banana. [peel thumb with other hand]

Yes, my dear, I’ll peel the skin
The skin of your banana

Ma, Ma, do you want a bite? [offer thumb]
A bite of my banana

Yes, my son, I’d like a bite
A bite of your banana

Ma, Ma, you took too much [complaining hands]
Too much of my banana

No my dear, it was just one bite [hold up one finger]
One bite of your banana

Ma, Ma, you’re a greedy guts [[thumbs down
You ate all my banana

Ma, Ma, will you buy me a, buy me a, buy me a
Ma, Ma, will you buy me a, buy me a banana?

CLAP YER HANDIES

Clap yer handies till daddie comes hame
Clap yer handies till daddie comes hame
Daddie has siller but mammie has nane
Clap yer handies till daddie comes hame.

CLAPA CLAPA HANDIES

Clapa clapa handies, daddie's comin hame
Sweeties in his pocket for a good wee wean.

COOKING ON THE BARBEQUE

Something's cooking at our house,
And it smells nice too oo oo oo
Something's cooking at our house,
Cooking on the barbeque

Burger, burger number one,
Burger number two oo oo oo,
Burger, burger number three,
Cooking on the barbeque

Get the plates and knives and forks
Get the napkins too oo oo oo
Get the sauce and pepper and salt
Cooking on the barbeque

Sausage, sausage number one,
Sausage number two oo oo oo,
Sausage, sausage number three,
Cooking on the barbeque

Get the drinks and open them up
Get the glasses too oo oo oo
Get the chairs and tables out
Cooking on the barbeque

Chicken leg, chicken leg number one
Chicken leg number two oo oo oo
Chicken leg, chicken leg number three
Cooking on the barbeque.
Words by Ewan McVicar
Tune Someone’s In The Kitchen With Dinah

CRADLE SONG

Mime piano, then fiddle, then rocking baby, then back to instruments

DANCE TAE YER DADDY

Dance tae yer daddie, ma bonnie laddie
Dance tae yer daddie, ma bonnie man.

Ye'll get a herrin aa tae yersel
Ye'll get a whippie and a Souple Tam.

Ye'll get a fishie, my bonny missie,
Ye'll get a fishie when the boats come in.

Dance tae yer daddie, ma bonnie laddie
Dance tae yer daddie, ma bonnie man.
Also called When The Boat Comes In

HEN'S MARCH TO THE MIDDEN

Mime piano, then fiddle. In second strain of tune is a repeated strident three note phrase which is the sound of the hen. Say 'cud dack it' each time.

KATIE BAIRDIE

Katie Bairdie had a yowe (sheep)
That could curtsey and could bow
Wasnae that a dainty yowe?
Dance, Katie Bairdie

Katie Bairdie had a horse
That could dance around the carse
Wasnae that a dainty horse?
Dance, Katie Bairdie

Katie Bairdie had a dog
It went jogging in the fog
Wasnae that a dainty dog?
Dance, Katie Bairdie

Katie Bairdie had a fox
Wore its socks in a cardboard box
Wasnae that a dainty fox?
Dance, Katie Bairdie

Katie Bairdie had a chook
That could cook a tasty deuk
Wasnae that a dainty chook?
Dance, Katie Bairdie

Katie Bairdie had a cat
Wore a fuzzy wuzzy hat
Wasnae that a dainty cat?
Dance, Katie Bairdie

Katie Bairdie had a coo
Bright red lipstick roon its moo
Wasnae that a dainty coo?
Dance, Katie Bairdie

Katie had a chunky monkey
Danced to music punky funky
Wasnae that a dainty monkey?
Dance, Katie Bairdie
Katie had a crocodile
We haven't seen her for a while

KIRKCUDBRIGHT CENTIPEDE

The Wee Kirkcudbright Centipede, she was very sweet
She was ever so proud of every one of her hundred feet
Early every morning her neighbours came to glance
She always entertained them with a beautiful little dance

Chorus
As leg number ninety four gave ninety five a shunt
Legs number one and two were twistin out in front
As legs numbers nine and ten were wriggling up the side
Legs seventy three and four were doing the Palais Glide

[use fingers to mime the dancing for each chorus]

Her neighbour Jenny Longlegs with jealousy was mad
She went out and bought herself a pencil and a pad
She came a month of mornings and made careful note
Of every step the centipede made and this is what she wrote

Armed with exact notation young Jenny Longlegs tried
To dance just like the centipede, she failed and nearly cried
She grabbed a hold of the centipede, she says ‘Now, have a look
And tell me how you do these steps I've written in my book?’

Said the centipede ‘Do I do that?’, and tried to demonstrate
She'd never thought on the thing before, she got into a terrible state
Her hundred legs were twisted, she got tied up in a fankle
She fractured seven shinbones, fourteen kneecaps and an ankle

As legs number one and two were tied to three and four
Legs number five and six were trampled on the floor
Leg number fifteen was attacked by number ten
Ninety seven and ninety eight will never dance again

The Wee Kirkcudbright Centipede, she suffered terrible pain
And some of us were very surprised she ever danced again
But now she tells her neighbours, every one that calls to see
Never try an explanation of what comes naturally.

MA MAW'S A MILLIONAIRE

Ma maw's a millionaire
Blue eyes and curly hair
See her walkin doon the street
Wi her big banana feet
Ma maw's a millionaire.

Ma maw's a millionaire
Blue eyes and curly hair
Sittin among the Eskimos
Playin the game of dominoes
Ma maw's a millionaire.

I know a teddy bear
Blue eyes and curly hair
Roly poly through the town
Knockin all the people down
I know a teddy bear

THE STICKY JIG

The tune is about a stick insect. Mime playing the harp strings, and the slow movements of the insect.

THE WIND THE WIND

The wind, the wind, the wind blows high,
The snow comes dashing from the sky.
Judy Johnston says she'll die
If she doesn't get the fella with the tartan tie.

She is handsome, she is pretty,
She is the belle of the Golden City,
She is courting one two three,
Pray come tell me who shall be.

THREE CRAWS

Three craws sat upon a wa
Sat upon a wa, sat upon a wa aw aw aw
Three craws sat upon a wa
On a cold and frosty mornin.

[hold three fingers of right hand chenched in left fist, and wave them]

The first craw was greetin for its maw.
[indicate first finger, then mime crying]

The second craw couldny flee at aa.
[indicate second finger, then waggle elbows trying to fly]

The third craw fell an broke its jaw.

[indicate third finger, then smack self gently on jaw]

The fourth craw wisnae there at aa.
[hide all fingers, then shrug and open hands out]

WHA SAW THE 42ND?

Wha saw the 42nd, wha saw them gaun awa
Wha saw the 42nd merchin doon the Broomielaw
Some o them had boots an stockins
Some o them had nane at aa
Some o them had tattie scones
For tae keep the cauld awa.

Wha saw the 42nd, wha saw them gaun awa
Wha saw the 42nd merchin doon the Broomielaw
Some o them had tartan toories
Some o them had nane at aa
Some o them had green umbrellas
For tae keep the rain awa.

WHEN I WAS SINGLE

When ah was single ah used to comb ma hair [comb hair]
Noo ah'm merried ah huvny the time tae spare [tap imaginary watch]
It's a life, a life, a weary weary life [hand to brow, tired]
Yer better tae be single than tae be a merried wife. [wag reproving finger]

When ah was single I used a powder puff [powder cheeks]
Noo ah'm merried ah canny afford the stuff. [pull empty pockets out]

One says "Mammie, help me intae ma pram" [mime lifting and placing]
Anither says "Mammie, gie's a piece and jam". [left hand as bread, right hand as spreading knife]

One says "Mammie, help me intae ma bed" [mime lifting and placing]
Anither says "Mammie, scratch ma wudden leg". [scratch leg]

WHO'S THAT UP THE CHIMNEY?

Who’s that up the chimney? [point up chimney]
Who’s that up the chimney?
Who’s that up the chimney?
I hope it’s Santa Claus

I hope he’s brought some presents [hands spread to show pile of presents at waist level]
I hope he’s brought some presents [show pile of presents at shoulder level]
I hope he’s brought some presents [show pile of presents above head level]
Cause I’ve been really good

I hope it’s not the chimney sweep [mime chimeny sweep brushing upwards]
That would be a swizz [thumbs down]

I’d like to see his reindeer [spread fingers on head for antlers]
Are their noses red? [right hand to nose]

I hope that he comes back again [thumb over shoulder]
Comes back again next year

Who’s that up the chimney? [with cupped hands whisper 'Santa!]
Who’s that up the chimney? [ditto]
Who’s that up the chimney? [ditto]
I hope it’s Santa Claus [whisper 'It is!']

YE CANNY SHOVE YER GRANNIE

Ye canny shove yer grannie aff a bus
Ye canny shove yer grannie aff a bus
Ye canny shove yer grannie
Cause she's yer mammie's mammie
Ye canny shove yer grannie aff a bus

Ye can shove yer other grannie aff a bus PUSH PUSH [both hands pushing]
Ye can shove yer other grannie
Cause she's just yer daddie's mammie

We'll all go round to see her after school HULLO GRANNIE [wave]

She'll feed us mince and tatties when we go YUM YUM [rub tummy]

Ma grannie wears an awfy woollie vest SCRATCH SCRATCH [scratch body]

Ye canny shove yer grannie aff a bus
Ye canny shove yer grannie aff a bus
Ye canny shove yer grannie
Cause she's yer mammie's mammie
Ye canny shove yer grannie aff a bus